Polishing Our Schedule Around Band

Yo! Mick here. This was me after our Saturday Band Camp this weekend. Don’t I look adorable when I’m falling asleep on the couch?

The first month back to school has past and Red and I are still making adjustments to our schedules. Band seems to rule as well as rock!

Although we love band, it is almost a full time career. On Tuesday and Thursday nights Red and I return to school at 5:45pm to practice marching drills and music until 8:45. We play for all of the home games and we have several competitions this year.

I think I mentioned before that I play the French horn and Red plays the baritone. Mum helps out as she can. She helped with getting the uniforms hemmed and organized, not to mention organizing us. Band has become a family activity. I had no idea how much goes into getting the band up and marching on the field.

Well, we’re starting to find our footing (LOL get it?) with getting our homework completed around the band schedule. Although there are some competitions coming up that may require some additional polishing of the schedule (I crack myself up).

Next we need to add in some chores. We’ve been relying on Mum for quite a bit but she’s giving us the heads up that changes are in order. We’re bigger, older and more mature and therefore need to be pitching in more.

That’s cool. More responsibility usually means we are able to do more independently too.

For example, this Saturday Mum took us to another Band Camp practice and gave us money so we could walk over to a fast food restaurant with some of the other band kids instead of packing a lunch. It was great to hang with our friends.

We’re still adjusting to our schedules but we sure do like band so fitting our less favorite things around it just makes sense. Even if we’re wiped out, we make sure to take care of our responsibilities. Band is so worth the effort!

Mum here.

I give the boys plenty of heads up with an explanation when I'm planning changes. This allows Red and Mick to work out in their minds the rationale and appropriate responses and tends to make the transition smoother.

This is especially helpful to kids on the autism spectrum.

Band is important to the boys and is a strong motivator. Although I recently learned from a woman on the autism spectrum that it is cruel to withhold a preferred activity, such as band, it hasn't been an issue. Red is very self motivated.

Further, the band director stresses to the students that they must maintain good grades and demonstrate responsibility in order to be in band. I don't have to be the bad guy or the enforcer - I get to be a team player and occasionally make "suggestions".

Marching with the Band to the Beat of Autism

Hey, Mum here.

Red plays the baritone in the high school marching band. I am so thankful that he's found a group of people to hang out with this fall doing something that brings him great pleasure - Music.

Band camp has really been instrumental (grin!) in transitioning Red to the high school.

He's leaving a junior high school with close to 800 students and going to a HS school with over 2000! I was overwhelmed picking up his schedule and books, I can't imagine how Red's going to feel on Monday when classes begin.

Kids with autism typically don't transition or accept changes very well. Many though will also stress and feel overly anxious with too much advanced warning about changes or transitions so parents can find themselves in a position of weighing when to tell and how much to tell.

I was in that position regarding Red's inoculations. At the time, I didn't tell him in advance because I knew just he'd react with a lot of anxiety and be totally stressed out. And I was right.

Band has helped ease the typical transition to high school a lot! I am so amazed. Red has had no problem getting up early and spending a long day (8-5:30!) learning new music and marches and meeting fellow band members.

Red's ready for his classes to begin. I'm not so ready. Red will need to learn the layout of his new campus, find "safe" areas to hang out, contend with kids who are comparatively huge, learn how to open and use a locker, and he's not going to be crazy about all of his classes.

The past several years Red has been mainstreamed into regular education classes for most of his day. Last year he had a lower level math class and a resource language arts class. He hates math regardless and felt the resource language arts class was below him.

Sure, for spelling it was. The kid out-spells me! As long as Red is permitted to copy the spelling words from a book and not "guess" during a pretest. Pretests cause him to memorize the word incorrectly so I've added to his IEP, "no pre-spelling tests". Yes, I do resort to micromanaging when necessary.

Red just doesn't test well for reading comprehension. He may understand more that we know but even if we're all off a bit, he needs help in reading.

Also I chose to get proactive even before classes started. I pull Red from his assigned math class because I heard from 4 different sources that that the teacher is a "yeller" (and why is this person a teacher?). That would just upset Red and would be no way to begin his day.

The other teacher who taught the level of Math Red needs only has one section and its during band. So, he's now in a remedial level math, an SDC math class. It is my hope that the teacher can create a math program that helps him learn his math facts and also helps prepare him for the exit exam.

Sigh. There are many executive decisions and things to consider when raising a special kid with autism. Parents truly need to be active advocates and very diligent in their children's education and assessing their needs. A balance between smothering or codling with helping them grow and mature is not easy to achieve.

So, ready or not, classes begin on Monday. I'm not telling Red about the math class decisions I've made. I'm saying nothing about the resource language arts class. Nope. Mum's the word because when it comes to Red, Mum knows best. (I hope! Please don't backfire!).

Thank goodness for the things I can predict and positive influences in my son's life like Music, Band, and Band Camp!

Band Camp Blues

Hey, Mick here. You know, Red's tail waggin', wet-nosed four legged brother?

Red began band camp this week (this is Red from last year). I'm trying to be happy for him (but he looks about how I feel). I mean, he's off meeting new High School buddies, getting to march and play his baritone and band is way cool but I'm mostly stuck at home by myself.

Mum's real happy about the band camp too. Band kids are generally good kids and it is important for Red to have some solid friendships because there are a lot of people who go to Red's school and some of them are pretty tough.

Band kids tend to stick together, eating and hanging out during lunch and breaks. The friends that Red is making this week and next before school starts up will really be helpful, so don't mind my sulkiness. I just feel like a lost puppy when my boy's gone.

Red does this incredible thing though. He takes me along in his imagination. I play the french horn and get to march and so much more. I'm playing first chair and I'm squad leader. My friend Louie also plays.

Red had a really awesome week! He met up with some of his band friends from Junior High and his mentor from HS has introduced him to more new friends. Every day he'd come home full of these great stories about his new experiences.

I believe this is going to be a really powerful year for Red, he's off to a great beginning.

I also know where I stand. Rather than going to the pizza and pool party on Friday, Red chose to come home so we could have some down time - just the two of us. We both needed to unwind and just be.